Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Judicious Juxapositions

Interesting juxtaposition of articles in January 29th's Seattle Post Intelligencer.

Kevin Miller, Executive Director of the Men's Network Against Domestic Violence, wrote an opinion piece saying that men should own up if and when they've been abusers. And that other men need to hold them accountable. Read it here.

The P-I online has a Soundoff, where readers can comment on articles. The comments on Miller's opinion, by and large, indicate we have a long ways to go to hold abusers accountable.

In the meantime, the P-I is publishing a series of articles this week describing how the University of Washington Husky football program, at the height of it's success, was protecting players who basically were felons. Paragon of accountability.

Why do some people abuse others? Because they can. No consequences.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

It stops bad guys, but wait that's not all (Part 2)

Today's Seattle Times reported that a man got just under 4 years jail time for using a stun gun on his 18 month old son.

Read it here.

Shockingly, the man's defense attorney said the man believes the mother done it, and accused the dad because they had argued earlier in the day and she wanted to make him sorry.

Sounds like a sorry excuse for torturing a toddler.

Financial Infidelity?

Last weekend's Seattle Times (1/20/08) ran an article about money secrets and intimate relationships. In a nutshell, money secrets are bad. They can erode the trust that forms the foundation of any marriage (or marriage-like relationship). The author cites studies that say 40% of all divorces are due to money issues. This is a form of infidelity.

[Money counselor Ruth] Hayden sees many forms of financial infidelity in her practice, most of it harmless — at least at first. She says women, in particular, are often advised to keep a secret stash of cash on hand "just in case."

"There's a Yiddish word, 'knipl,' for little pots of money that have been used over the years by women," she says. "That's why when you clear out the house of an old woman, you go through all the pockets of all the coats and look through all the important books like the Bible, because there are little pots of money everywhere. Somehow, there is the illusion of safety if I can tuck away a $20 here and a $50 there."

Funny that my mother, decades ago, advised me to make sure I always had a bank account in my name only, just in case. (No, not squirreling away bills in books and coat hems.)

As a self-defense instructor, I have to tell my clients that they need control over financial matters in their lives. Probably the MOST liberating change of the last century was women becoming legally able to own property and keep their own earnings. Abusive spouses very often work hard to gain control over all financial resources. So, until you're sure that the live-in boyfriend or husband is not an abuser, keep that separate account.

To read the article, click here.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Life's Little Ironies

This January, thanks to a couple of highly-publicized attacks and killings, more and more people are contacting me (and others) about self-defense and community safety training. All the more ironic that Seattle's mayor and police chief announced that the rate of violent crime is the lowest it's been since 1968.

You can read the identical article (from Associated Press) in both The Columbian and the Seattle PI.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

It stops bad guys, but wait that's not all!

Taser unveiled a new stun gun holster at this year's Consumer Electronics Show. So now not only can your stun gun come in designer colors, your holster can play music.

Read this MSNBC article for more info on this holster that also is an mp3 player.

Taser also introduced 3 new colors for it's personal protection line for women: Leopard Print, Red Hot, and Fashion Pink.

I don't know about you, but if I'm feeling like I need to carry a Taser, I don't think I'll be distracting myself (not to mention projecting that "not paying attention" aura) by bopping along to my latest music downloads.

Personally, I'm waiting for the bottle opener/mp3 player combo. In Electric Blue.